Monday, February 20, 2006

Fake Kid Government Demands (At Least) Fake Kid Civility

It's a perfect day for a snow day. Ice made the roads slick and dangerous, but the whole mess was pretty much gone by 10am. I needed to be away from school-ness for another day (Those who read last week's post agree, I did need a party and so hated missing Scott's for I hear he is famous for just the sort of meatballs that Inheritor of Heaven mentioned...ok, not really, but I wish I had made the party.).

The plan was for father daughter oil changes so there was lots of time to catch up. I was able to fill him in on the character debate that has rocked the fake kid government program I work with. Let me fill you in.

For the first time in five years, we hosted a visiting delegation from TX at our State Fake Kid Government Conference. Texas has hosted our delegates for years and have been very gracious hosts, we were happy to return the favor and I was even happier that the delegation was chaperoned by my college roomate (This is a long and winding tale, you need only know that we both work with the same organization in different states totally by chance. It's gotten us back in touch and it's been lovely.). I was all ready to roll out the red carpet for my friend and her kids! It would be like "Be Our Guest" in Beauty and The Beast! Silverware would prance about and we would sing in French accents!

As the sessions began, somehow the silverware stopped dancing. In fact, at a couple of points, the forks and knives flew to the eyes of our friends to the South. Fortunately, the kids were able to see that the meaness was isolated to one particular group--but Oh! That group!!! When a TX delegate opposed a bill proposed by a student from the Delegation of Evil, she was called "a fucking moron". Motions were made to withdraw their voting rights, and suggestions were made that they "Go back to Mexico". All of this came from the same kid, the same kid who was somehow later elected Fake Kid Speaker of The Fake Kid House.

His office has been revoked and his bid for National Conference withdrawn. This isn't (as much) a story about Fake Kid Government scandal, but of the response from the Evil Delegate. Can you believe that the kid has written a letter of protest offering this as a defense?

Even the Vice President of the United States has lost control and used
four-letter words on the senate floor.

Now it comes back to my dad. He suggested I forward this response to our VP, informing him that his legacy. I wonder if I will. I wonder if a similar defense could be used if a child was caught performing oral sex somewhere in the Capitol. I don't think the defense will hold any water with the other members of the Board of Directors, I know it doesn't with me.


Susan said...

This is so damn funny. And I wish I had a Cheney's-got-a-gun joke on hand, but I don't. Anyone?

educat said...

This post began with me wanting to post the entire letter complete with my tacky annotations. I couldn't. It was outside the realm of even my standards and there were too many real names to disguise.

But I made that joke there.

You know, I also failed to mention a joke from the father daughter outing. As we came in, an announcement came over the PA, "Would the customer who ordered the NASCAR cake please return to the bakery?"

...and we're in the Southside Wal Mart.

Dad speculated that the bakery would be overrun in seconds.

Scott Jones said...

Please send it to the Vice President.

Anonymous said...

This comment is completely unrelated to this entry, but a friend sent me a link to this article from the Houston Chronicle and I thought you would enjoy it:

educat said...

Karen, I had already heard of the tagging, but a website named "Knitta, please!"?

Thank you. I dine for weeks on the leftover humor of that phrase.