Thursday, December 23, 2004

Do You Suppose That Waiting Hands On Eyes Veronica Has Gone To Hide?

My family spent the day at a funeral for a man at my home church. His 95 year old mother has been an adopted Nana to my sister and I for most of our lives and so we found ourselves in the odd role of pseudo family. Nana is suffering from Alzheimer's and so my mother helped her through the day. My sister and I spent time with her waiting for the family to get home from the graveside.

I wish I could know if Nana understood today anywhere in her mind. Somehow she knew my sister and I and told us often that she loved us and was proud of us. We talked about how many people were at the church ("Have I been to that church before? It's a nice one" Nana has been a member of that church since at least the 1930's) but never seemed to understand what she was there for. She asked where her Jim (the deceased) was today, did I see him? (I answered no, it was a closed casket). Strangest of all, when I left, she looked me in the eye, called me by name, and told me she loved me.

I love Nana too and maybe that's the point. I don't mind being single at all until I think of being old with no family left but maybe the lesson from Nana is that investing your life in people means you keep them. Then maybe they keep you.


KristentheRN said...

Micah and I might never have kids, so the same kinds of thoughts have crossed our minds as well. My Uncle Bob gives me hope though. My grandmother's brother, he never married or had kids, but he's always been like a third grandparent to us. As he grows older, if he needs care or any assistance- we will give it to him.
Maybe you just need to cultivate young friends! Then, as you age, you can guilt them in to taking you in and keeping you out of the nursing home. Sigh.

educat said...

You're right, Kristen. It's occured to me the role that kids of my dear friends will probably play (thanks, Jill, for having 5 kids...). It actually makes me more hopeful than sad now. I invest in high school kids, friends, and their kids, I will be taken care of somehow.

I think such investments will pay off for all of us--you and Micah included! There's a reason that Bit O' Community is the tastiest candy bar around.

Or perhaps the impossible will happen and both of us will get knocked up (after my requisite loving relationship).

Who knows, but somehow I believe it works.

Norma said...

Even when she doesn't know who you are, you know who she is. Someone who loves you.