I Am The State

So we're one-third through testing now. The writing test is done and we've two glorious days of multiple choice before we call it a semester.

I wanted to post some music in homage to the season, kind of like I did last year, but I was dog tired and it never really occurred to me that day that I even have a blog (sorry, I think of you sometimes but dang, I couldn't even get to the bathroom). If I think about it tonight, I'll throw up some music and you can pretend it's postdated.

Mostly, our kids have a good attitude about testing. They want to do well but don't stress too much about it. I have, however, one group of kids that seems to be the perfect storm for silliness. They don't mean to talk all the time, but they must be constantly occupied or they will grab each other and make fart noises, they just can't help it.

So anything I tell the kids to do is followed by a threat of the State.

"If you speak at all before everyone has finished the test, I have to report exactly what you said to The State"

(Thankfully, this one didn't backfire on me, I can imagine what some kids would say to "The State")

"If your cell phone goes off during the test, I have to report it to The State and everyone's test will be invalid. You'll all have to retake it."

"I have to report to The State anyone who finishes their essay within half an hour. They suspect that you haven't tried if you do it too quickly."

It all really worked. The threat of The State was enough to get everyone working and behaving. I like to imagine that my kids all pictured this guy behind a desk, waiting to catch them in wrongdoing...

...except he probably wears a tie to work. Since he doesn't have a neck, he sort of jauntily hangs it off the panhandle.