Monday, December 19, 2005

Proof That No Theatre Degree Is Ever Wasted

I have recieved the greatest honor of my career. Better than making the third ballot for Teacher of The Year (really, third ballot is enough. The winner has to do this big ol portfolio that's hardly worth the cheese and cracker reception.), better than that one kid who worked in the food court at the mall and would grandly proclaim "No teacher of mine pays for a smoothie when I am working!", better than the polyester school logo t shirt that we got for Christmas. The best ever.

We have a mandatory meeting on our plan to talk with district tech personnel. It's our chance to "open up the lines of communication" so that the tech staff is more "user friendly" and it gives me a great chance to contemplate my similarity to Dilbert. One problem surfaces during the discussion: impossibly slow log in. Some of our computers take up to twenty minutes to log on. The suggestion? Video someone logging in. Show a clock in the video and send it to admin. Then perhaps some funds will be allocated to replace the worst of our computers.

"This" a colleague pipes in "is the perfect job for Ms Educat."

and she's soooooo right!

I am storyboarding right now. I have plans to knit during the film and show just how much knitting I can get done while waiting to log in. I had thought about planting a seed and then eating the resulting fruit by the time login happens. I could show mould growing on some food. There are just too many possibilities.

Can we call this blog entry a casting call? What talent do you have that can be accomplished during a 20 min login? Headshot and resume requirements may be waived if your talent is compelling enough.

7 comments:

"Ms. Cornelius" said...

Knitting would be so great. I do not know how to knit, although my favorite folksinger, Christine Lavin, knits during intermission at all her shows.

I could play all of "Stairway to Heaven" THREE TIMES on my guitar, or I could play "Stairway to Heaven," "Free Bird," and "American Pie." Or I could do ALL of "Alice's Restaurant," plus "I Wanna Hold Your Hand."

OR I could recite "Little Orphant Annie" plus "The Cremation of Sam McGee" from memory.

The benefits of an Okie ejjicashun are without number...

The Crib Chick said...

Let the mom of five chime in; I propose a 'Night Before Christmas' style night cap, perhaps some oversized jammies that can be put on over clothing...set a timer and take a nap, in other words. That's what I'd do, but then again, I'm always looking for ways to get in more sleep.

Winderweedle said...

Set me up an espresso machine and I could handcraft about fifty different beverages of your choice in a twenty minute time span... maybe seventy five... maybe Crib Chick can come drink 'em all and get rid of that nap craving...

Keaton said...

I love you. So incredibly much.

Yours,
Keaton

Inheritor of Heaven said...

I could take attendance in period 2 (including entering it on my already logged-in computer), then teach about 1/3 of the days lesson, then re-enter the attendance (on still logged-in computer)of those tardy students who have since arrived, then begin teaching second 1/3 of lesson, and then re-re-enter newly tardy students to finally update the attendance for period 2 (assuming of course no more tardy students arrive during last 1/3 of class). I would say that would be close to 20 minutes. And would show how efficient it is to have a computer that logs in quickly.

Melissa N said...

Or you could show ice melting or paint drying, since watching both of those occur is about as fun as waiting for some of those computers to log in.

(Although knitting would be infinitely more fun while waiting than watching both the computer log on AND ice melt/paint dry)

Tim Sean said...

I think this would only work for aging men, but for the sheer creepiness of it: Cut your fingernails, check the clock for more time, then start on the toe nails, check for more time, trim the nose hairs, check for more time, trim ear hairs, check for more time, groom the run-away eyebrows, check for more time...